Pumpkin Eater

My skin crawls at the thought of shuddering against your fingers.

When you drift too close I'm reeling away like the quick coil of a very long snake.

It's not because I don't care for you but something I consider worse.

I'm repulsed by you and it makes my emotions unbearable.

This is what happens when love is lost.

Stripped away, peeling in layers of incompetence that only happens at the hands of infidelity.

It's not enough that you did it, it's the part where you lied.

And in the dead of night, when I lay awake replaying every moment we've shared,

the response echoes in my head saying "most people move on".

And then I hate you all over again. 

And more and more and more until I look in the mirror and hate myself too.